I See Fake People

There are definitely things out there the annoy the snot out of me.  We all have our pet peeves. 
One of mine is people who act “fake”.  I just do not understand how people are so flipping afraid to be their own person.  I mean, who cares what other people think?  God created us all for diversity within the Body of Christ, not for us to all be uniform walking dead zombies. 
Lately, I have been somewhat frustrated with people who do things just because other people are doing them.  Just like the kid that had the ability to see dead people, after a decade of being a “churchgoer”, I now have the ability to say “I see fake people”.   
After a few years of attending “church”, I started to feel intimidated to speak on a lot of different things, because unfortunately, most of the people I interacted with could not handle my straightforward approach.  I felt like I did not “fit in”.  When I would express my opinion of various doctrine, I started to feel myself slowly being excluded from a lot of “church” functions, because I guess I was way too straightforward with others.  Quite frankly, this was one of the main reasons I stop attending the “system”.  I did not isolate myself from gathering with other people, I just got out of the environment that seemed to spawn “fake” people on a daily basis. 
We are constantly reminded by society that we should think a certain way, act a certain way, dress a certain way, love a certain way.  Well I say bullshit to that.  You see, when I went to “church” that definitely made me realize this even more.  It is sad to say, but I could count on one hand the number of “real” people I met while in “church” (or even outside the walls), and I went to a church with 18,000 members. 
What I cannot count is the number of churchgoers I have met over the years who have been all smiles every time I have seen them.  It made me want to throw up.  It got to the point I thought beautiful sunlight and a rainbow would shine through their bedroom windows every morning, and that their world was full of chocolate and candy canes.  Then I would see “fruit”* in their lives that was definitely not something to smile about.  So why do most people feel the need to act fake all the time? 
I mean after all, gathering together as His Body is supposed to be where people can be real and worship God and not have to pretend, right? 
It is sad to think that most of our “churches” have been reduced to being an exclusive club where we have to guard our every step so others will not gossip about us or look down on us, but in many cases that is what today’s institutional church has become.  It is like walking on eggshells.  People do not feel free to share things about themselves in this environment because they are afraid of appearing vulnerable and weak.  I would also like to point out that if churchgoers put up a facade while attending church then I am sure they do the same thing everywhere else in their life: at work, at the grocery store, and any other time there may happen to be other people around. 
How are we to love and encourage one another as Christ commands if people do not let others know who they are, and what is really going on in their lives.  It is time for this behavior to stop. 
*a metaphor, comparing people to fruit-bearing trees. In the same way that you can tell the nature and quality of a tree by its fruit, you can tell the nature and quality of a person by their actions.

11 thoughts on “I See Fake People

      1. Yep, pretty allergic to BS! Your post got me thinking about a couple of different identity crises I’ve had in my life. FIrst, in my teens into my twenties I developed my poser self (the kind that John Eldredge talks about) that was all about partying and having a good time. But then, when God began getting a hold of me, and I entered the institution, I saw that people acted much different. So I began forming a new identity – what I thought was a “good” Christian. Now, this wasn’t all bad, because I did need to shed some of my old false self. But who I was becoming “in Christ” was also a load of crap. I was becoming who I thought I was supposed to become, not entering into who Christ designed me to be. It’s only been very recently that I’ve made some huge discoveries of who I really am! And it’s freeing! It’s fricken beautiful!

        I’ve read some studies recently that come to a similar conclusion. They say that on average, people don’t start really knowing who they are – they don’t start feeling comfortable in their own skin until about 40 – or somewhere in their 40’s. I think this is interesting, because this is also about the time people start flipping out and enter into a “mid-life crisis.” They did all the things they were supposed to do. Go to college. Get a job. Get married. Have kids. Then, when the kids are starting to leave the nest, they all of a sudden wake up and go, “Who am ??!!” Then they go do crazy shit like pierce their nipples and buy a new corvette (I had an old boss that did this very thing – although he took it a step further and got his penis pierced. I mean, come on!).

        So, I appreciate your writing. Things don’t have to be this way. And regarding the church thing – I entered the organic/simple/house church world about 9 years ago – and it has completely changed my life! Real people. Real community. Real life with Christ. That’s what it’s all about!

      2. Shon – Are you sure you are not me living somewhere else?

        I do not have a boss with a pierced penis (as far as I know), but your story resonates with me a lot. I am going on 42 and left the institutional church around 39 to 40 years old. I think I finally opened my eyes to see all the BS I was stepping in. I added your blog to my roll. Looking forward to hearing and learning from you. I am glad you stopped by.


  1. Ha ha! Yeah, I get the feeling we’re riding on the same wave-length. Looking forward to reading more of your thoughts. Thanks for adding my blog to your roll! I need to go do some updates on my own. I’m sure we’ll be having more thought trading soon…

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