This is not a subject about church, or the church system that causes my eyes to water. There will be more of that when I get the sniffles.
However, this is a subject I have not given much thought, but I was asked this question today, and it made me think.
Should you charge your (adult) kids rent? (The definition would be a kid working a full time job, not going to school, and lives at home.)
After I pondered this subject for about 30 seconds, I said heck yes you should!
Ok, I know it sounds heartless, but hear me out. First, it is not a right or wrong if you should or shouldn’t charge rent, there could be many factors involved, and it is your call as a parent. However, I think it could be a great learning tool to charge some sort of rent.
When your children (adult age) live at home, work, and pay no rent, they are learning to live on a disposable income they will likely never again have their entire lives. They are learning that they can spend every cent they make on their personal indulgences. That to me is a bunch of BS, and is not reality.
I think if you are a parent that does not take rent from your child, you are abdicating your responsibility to teach your kids (oh I mean your adult kids) about what life is really like outside the walls. All it does is let them get used to indulging themselves way more than they should.
I never really thought about this subject before because my kids are 11 and 8, but thought I would write about it since I was confronted with the question.
I need some comments. The person that asked me might not like my answer 🙂
What have you done, have you charged rent?
Allergic to BS 
Swanny,
You are so right. If you love your children you will charge them, at least a minimal rent. It helps prepare them to stand on their own feet, and, as you say,”to live on a disposable income they will likely never again have their entire lives”.
We have five children, the baby is now 45. We gave each one three months rent free when they began work, and charged them afterwards. They were well prepared to face facing their responsibilities as they moved from home.
Aussiejohn – I like the 3 months to get situated grace period 🙂
Our oldest just turned 18 but we are not charging her rent (primarily because she doesn’t have a job so I would have to give her the money anyway) It may sound terribly old fashioned but I am less likely to charge a nominal rent to my daughters than my sons.
Arthur – Can you explain why you would charge your daughter less? That is interesting?
Here is a question that someone asked. What if you ask for rent and the child refuses to pay?
Resist the proud. Give grace to the humble.
My boys are 3, 2, and 7 months….and have a ways to go! 🙂 I think we would charge the rent after discussing it with them, praying about it, a “grace period”, and they had jobs. It would be “practice” for them to face the real world as men, and not extending the false fantasy-life of disposable youth. Most importantly, a way of loving them enough to care about how each one of them face the future.
Swanny, I would prefer my girls live at home. My sons need to get out and get jobs so they are prepared to provide for a family.
Todd – Rent from 3 boys will cover your main mortgage and your mortgage from a home in the Caymans… 🙂 Just kidding.
Arthur – I kinda understand. It still does not answer why you would charge your daughters less than your sons. If you prefer your girls live at home but they have a job and your son was home and had a job making the same amount, you would charge one a less amount? That is what I was trying to figure out.
It is a matter of incentive. I actually would likely not charge any of my kids anything. I think there is a tendency to toss kids out of the house when they hit 18 to make their way in the world which has a lot more to do with American rugged individualism than it does with anything Biblical. Of course I also don’t think parents should discourage their kids from getting married until they have had time to “see the world” so once they get married I would assume they would move out!